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HEY, BESTIE: My husband is on Tinder, but he says he didn’t betray, what should I do?


Hey, BESTIE: I just found out my husband was on Tinder. Needless to say, I was devastated. He claims not to have cheated, but feels that way. He said he just downloaded the app to have some fun and watch, but I don’t think I can get past that. What should I do?

Most people do not enter into a relationship expecting their second wife to look for another partner elsewhere.

In this case, your spouse uses an online dating app to look for what else may be available. . .even if he hasn’t physically met anyone from the app yet – this may be the reason he mentioned that he “didn’t cheat”.

Your definition of cheating can be very different from your partner’s definition, and it would be ideal to clarify what those definitions are.

You need to be clear – for example, black and white, not shades of gray – with whether online flirting, searching, etc. are considered. deception and a forbidden zone for relationships.

If so, let your partner know.

It sounds ridiculous that I even have to mention this, but I have clients who regularly explain that if they are not physically or sexually related to someone else, then it is not considered cheating.

Only you can determine this for yourself and your own relationships.


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